I wore leopard capris to test a theory
Conformity, self-expression, and why copying the trend makes you invisible.
I recently attended an event at the Living Beauty space in Toronto, and the conversation was around conformity vs. self-expression. Arguably, it’s one of my favourite conversations because I think it touches different areas and impacts you in different ways.
There are three key takeaways I think are important to share, all worth your attention as a reflection exercise.
Thoughts and beliefs are at the core of your self-image. Beliefs are primarily inherited from your parents, your group of friends, and the environment where you were raised. They are often the root cause of how you show up when it comes to your confidence and the belief you hold in yourself. Once you’re able to change those beliefs, and the negative thoughts you keep coming back to, you’ll be able to level up and close the gap between who you are and who you want to become.
Curating what you consume, the people you spend time with, and the places you frequent is going to allow you to get closer to that version you’re becoming. This ties back to building confidence, because your input is determining the quality of your output.
And you need to continuously build your taste, because that is the filter you apply to the daily decisions you make. You can build it by being intentional with what you consume, and by exploring things outside your usual orbit. Taste is a library of thoughts, emotions, visuals, objects that you pull from on an ongoing basis in your day-to-day life.
These three points are very interconnected, because they determine whether you are going to express yourself or conform to societal norms. When you are firm in your beliefs, when you curate everything around you to align with those beliefs and build your taste, that’s when you’re fully able to express yourself regardless of trends and societal expectations.
Conformity is the default. Self-expression is a decision.
What's Worth Your Attention
Worth Sitting With
How far are you willing to conform to societal norms before you’re ready to blaze your own trail?
It’s important to remain aware that the more you conform, the more you lose yourself, and that there is a fine balance between the two.
Worth Filtering
Trends and standing out.
I just got confirmation to my theory, again, that the secret to standing out when you’re in a room full of women is your personal style and how you show up.
My approach to styling my outfits is two-pronged: accessories, or relying on one element that becomes the focal point, the centre of attention. Of course, I take into consideration the location, the type of event, whether it is more casual or more elegant, the people attending, and how I want to show up.
For this event, I wanted one element to be the focal point, so I decided to wear a Canadian brand called Ahiri, a pair of capris with a leopard print - fun, yet professional. The rest of the outfit was pretty simple and neutral. The result? I had five different women compliment my outfit, and then I was asked to film a video sharing the things I’m gravitating towards this summer, because “this girl has interesting leopard capris.” In that moment, I realized that I stood out, and it was my personal style and that unique element that was differentiating me from the rest.
Everyone is trying to follow trends to stay relevant. However, simply copying the trend will only make you fit in and be the same as everyone else. That’s why it’s important to adapt trends to your style, your personality, how you want to show up. Filter it through your taste and you stand out.
Worth Curating
The video I was asked to film, in list form: what I’m gravitating towards this summer. Glowy makeup, taking care of my nails, and clothes that allow self-expression.
From the salon,
— Sabina